Donbet paid in six hours flat and I'm still angry

So I'm up right, $340 off fifty bucks, ETH hit the wallet before I even made coffee yesterday — should be buzzing yeah? And I am for like forty minutes until I start thinking well if I just run it back, if I just find that same rhythm, and now it's 2am and I'm staring at a balance that says $12 and some change and the win feels like it happened to someone else. Watched the match with mates earlier and I was there physically but couldn't tell you a single play, just thumb hovering over the phone under the table like a freak. The hiding from Maya's gotten so routine I don't even register the stress of it anymore, just background hum, and that might be the worst part honestly — the way you stop feeling the thing that should stop you