Six hours of oxygen then back underwater

That GoldenCrown clear last week—£340, clean, same day—felt like finally being allowed to breathe. Covered the bill that's been hanging over me since June, Mum's glasses still sitting there unspoken but at least ONE thing got fixed, you know? And now it's Monday and I'm already doing the maths on whether toast for dinner counts as a meal and the flat's gone this weird dead quiet where you can hear the fridge hum and it's somehow worse than the noise.

Six hours. That's what I get. Six hours of "okay, okay, I'm alright actually" before the crash comes harder than before. It's not even about the money now it's about the feeling of being dropped from a height I was stupid enough to climb to. Cam said it in that other thread—oxygen, yeah—but nobody warns you about the altitude sickness after.

Donbet's got that 150% still sitting there and my thumb's hovering over deposit again because at least when I'm IN it there's noise, there's something happening, I'm not just lying here listening to my own breathing go shallow. The win cooled off and took my good mood with it and I know I know I KNOW this is the pattern but knowing doesn't stop the wanting.

Anyone else crash this hard after? Like the higher you clear the worse the Tuesday feels? Tell me it's not just me being broken please.